it seems like such a long time ago - i think it was about five years now...
I couldn't breathe...
the definition of an anxiety attack.
I couldn't breathe.
I ran away.
something told me to go to key west...
so I did...
all the while on the plane
I remembered the phone call from my mother who after 26 years
of missing -- lost - gone -- diasappeared - reappeared...
her voice on the the other end...
"it's mommy..."
I laughed.
"oh really..."
she had no answers.
no wisdom.
could not explain where shed been.
why she left...
or even what she wanted...
maybe a piece of the 25 million from my father's estate...
I don't know.
dad's death was the only thing that could un-earth her, bring her to the surface...
her explanation --
she wanted to convert me to "jesus."
of course she did...
yeah I couldn't breathe
I went to key west and waited
rented an apartment for a month --
ended up getting an infection - in my - well you know
and had to go to a doctor...
a doctor that could treat me with "medicine"
eastern AND western
they say you get what you need...
I got needles in my ears, in my wrists
I got a prescription for penicilion
but the real medicine was you -- kieth
who could guess the story you told of your life would heal me
let me breathe
its sounds so fantastic
a boy who grows up on a native amercian indian reservation
taught the ways of the medicine man
shuns his heritage and runs away to the ciy
becomes an underground CIA operative
deep underground
"black ops"
"special forces"
"information collection"
I got the idea...
and then in a warehouse, one night late, you wake up --
three feet above the air -
a lonely dark warehouse -
hung from the back of the neck -- by a meathook...
left to die...
in the hospital for a year...
time to think - reflect
in and out for a year -
your body and mind re-arranged itself
you didn't die -
great spirits healped you --
you searched the heavens for an answer --
then you heard --
get a plan...go to school
go to accupncture school
become a medicine man...
the story was so amazing --
your teacher happened to be my doctor back in nyc...
coincidence?
I couldn't believe it...
you got healed...
went to key west...
dodged your old bosses from the under-world - the netherworld of the CIA
to practice medicine...
to be in the exact place to meet me -- right on time
needles in my forehead...
two weeks of needles...
I could breathe...
I keep your card in my wallet
grey with two dolphins swimming at the top...
and your name...
I wrote you a letter two years ago
but then
after a month it was returned
"no such person at this address..."
today I woke up thinking of you --
hoping someday you could read the letter I wrote to you -
maybe you could know how you saved my life --
or what an honor it was to meet you --
a fellow shaman -- healer
medicine man -- traveler...
thanks kieth
somewhere you know of my gratitude
as it floats on the wind
telling you of the great heart you have....
do good -
the world is held together by people like you --
love
Sean
